Boyfriend wants from relationship to dating

I keep thinking over and over, “I don’t want to lose him.” I feel pathetic. He was there when I was struggling, when family members got sick, when I felt that my life was in pieces. He’s my first love, but there’s more to that: he’s the first guy I ever went on a getaway with. A few tears fall out of his eyes too, but he tells me the situation ain’t changing.

I pull out of the driveway and start my way down to Los Angeles.I stare at the rows and rows of cars on the highway, all of us moving at a snail’s pace. Slowly, achingly slowly, moving onward, my insides hollow and throbbing with hurt, biting back tears, onto a new life. But now I know that its death is giving life to something different, something better. My truth is that I will never find anybody as good, and I shouldn’t even bother. He is a great person, but as far as relationships go, this one isn’t healthy or sustainable anymore.And if I don’t want to be alone forever, I’m going to have to face the scary world and put myself out there at some point.

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